Just waiting to get picked up to go to school. I bet I'll be late, because the person driving me usually is. I'm so smart and forgot to pick up bus tickets last night while I was working, and sadly have no change at the moment, so I have no way of getting anywhere and I sure as shit am not walking.
I went for a run this morning, all up and downhill. FML. I went up and down four times before calling it quits and waddling back home panting like a dying cow. It was great, I loved it.
Will you tell me once again, how we're gonna be just friends. If you're for real and not pretend, then I guess you can hang with me. When my patience is wearing thin, when I'm ready to give in, will you pick me up again?
Then I guess you can hang with me.
If you do me right, I'm gonna do right by you and if you keep it tight, I'm gonna confide in you.
I know what's on your mind, there will be time for that too if you hang with me.
Just don't fall recklessly, headlessly in love with me cause it's gonna be all heartbreak, blissfully painful insanity. If we agree, you can hang with me.
When you see me drift astray, out of touch and out of place, will you tell me to my face? Then I guess you can hang with me.
If you do me right, I'm gonna do right by you and if you keep it tight I'm gonna confide in you.
I know what's on your mind, there will be time for that too if you hang with me.
don't fall recklessly, headlessly in love with me cause it's gonna be
all heartbreak, blissfully painful insanity. If we agree, you can hang
with me. -Hang with me, Robyn
More pleasure by far I find
in watching a sky of stars than signing a deathwarrrant.
More pleasure is in my mind
when listening to the flowers
as they murmer, "Look, it's he,"
as though the garden I stroll
than staring on rows of rifles
to take a toll of those
who would make an end of me.
That's why myself I'll never
take any role of power.
B let me read her Russian poetry book from 1961. Loved it, of course!
It's just about 4 a.m. and I'm not sure if I'm awake or half asleep. I've been awake almost an hour, but mymind is a little cloudy. Brooke is at Kyle's, I assume she is sleeping there if she isn't home yet. I'm hoping she's okay, and I kind of wish I didn't slip into a coma before it was time to leave. Brooke woke me up but I was not alive enough to pull my ass from the warm blankets.
So here I am, once again, sitting in the kitchen 'derp'-ing around on the internet.
Tomorrow I come home; hopefully the Greyhound isn't awful. I hope the express bus doesn't fuck me into being there for 1 (when my last bus was supposed to leave before I was told to take a different bus at a different time)and then end up being later than expected again.
I want some time with Boyfriend before going back to school and getting into work-mode this week.
Like I said before, lots of assignments to get done in only a short period of time when work and nothingness come into play.
I've eaten so much food here, fuck. Hooray for squeezing into a little red dress next weekend. Have a wedding to go to with Bf. Gotta look nice... Guess I should probably get my run on.
Leaving Ottawa tomorrow afternoon. Not excited to go back to school on Monday.
Hopefully the bus back to Toronto won't be as crappy, but I'll keep you updated ;)
I miss all my babies!
Ashley is staying at her grandparents house so she'll be in the immediate area and at my leisure at all times. Score.
Lots to do this week, though. I have a couple assignments due at the end of the week, ugh.
I think I'm getting drunk tonight. Let's hope ;)
Brooke and I made a delicious pho dish for dinner.
I'm enjoying the white world I see here. Too bad there's no snow in Mississauga or Toronto, this is really pretty. Last night none of the roads had been plowed, so getting here was a major bitch between getting stuck behind not one, but three snow plows. But when walking to Kyle's from Brooke's, the snow was heavy at our feet and we walked along the road and I fell in love with the large trees that were blanketed in white.
Anyway, here I am in Brooke's apartment, waiting for her to finish her make-up. We're going to make dinner and I'm tres excited for chicken. Nomnomnomnomnomnom.
Totally had waffles for breakfast. Fatty..
As expected, today was a good day. Lindsay and I made our way downtown on an extremely stuffy hour long bus ride, ventured into the subway and found ourselves at Younge and Dundas sq.
We went into a few stores, shopped for a dress for a wedding I'm attending in a week or so. Found a nice red one, I hope boyfriend likes it because if not I might just die and wear a garbage bag and heels. Yum, right?
I just got home from work, which was hellish as usual. Some people are extremely cheap and even more rude. Saying every one of them is that way would overexaggerating, however. There are some who are super nice and tell me "God bless," which is sometimes sweet and sometimes just really annoying.
Regardless, I had a good day.
Tomorrow I'll leave Mississauga and go back downtown to see Boyfriend, only to get on a bus early Friday afternoon to sit on a 5-hour Greyhound ride to Ottawa to see my darling friend, Brooke.
I'm excited for this weekend, it's going to be great. It kinda sucks that I don't get to spend my entire reding week with my girlfriends or Boyfriend, but I desperately need to see Brooke and her apartment. She's lived in Ottawa for over a year now and I still haven't visited once. What kind of a friend does that!?
Can't wait to see my baby, I miss cuddling up to him at night and spending my days in his arms.
Ou, so cute.
I think the progression of a dying rose is quite beautiful. The scent begins to dull, the center of its petals dry from inside and wilt their way outward, hanging ever-so-slightly, bottom petals pulling it to tilt. The petals are drying slowly. They no longer hold their once crimson hue and silky texture.
The bottom, pulling petal is dying the fastest. It will fall first and the rest will follow as this week continues.
Once the petals have dried, I will use them as bookmarks in my Sonnets book. Ou, I'm so cute.
I hate going through all the effort of washing my face and brushing my teeth because I'm SO TIRED, and then lying down in bed and realizing I'm wide awake again. What a waste of yawns!
I'm lying in bed at the moment and I have my screen tilted so far down that I can't se a Goddamn thing I'm typing (my apologies for any typos). I'm too lazy to proof read this, and I'm certainly FAR too lazy to turn on a light so I can see my keyboard.
This weekend was a good one, much better than last. I caught up on some sleep, saw my girlies a couple of times and spent time with my baby. My big, big baby. Hah.
Friday was spent alone, as usual, because no one ever wants to do anything on a Friday. So I slept for almost 13 hours and couldn't have been in a better mood. Until I went to work. Then I saw my ugly brother... then went out to a pub with the girls and a couple guys from high school. I love when random people show up and join our group that they obviously weren't invited for to begin with but you know, whatever...
Saw my baby today/ yesterday. Spent the night together and went on a *date* I guess you could say. It was tres cute and I enjoyed it until he said he thinks karaoke is stupid. (Hey boyfriend, stop shaking your head as you read this ;)) So I gotta say.. KARAOKE IS NOT STUPID ITS AMAZING.
We went to the movies and saw Chronicle, a film seemingly shot by a hand-held video camera. Unlike Cloverfield or whatever that stupidness was, it was actually pretty decent. I mean, who doesn't like seeing a cute Leonardo DiCaprio look-a-like lose his mind and blow shit up?
It was wonderful.
Baby and I had all you can eat sushi and I honestly don't want to ever see another grain of rice in my life. I was so full I thought I was going to explode. I need to stop going to all you an eat places.. everytime I go I feel like I'm going to die.
Regardless, it was delicious.
Tonight, I went out with the girlies to see The Vow. Oh, what a tear jerker, sort of. It was sad and unfortunate but overall, I wasn't too thrilled with the plot. Rachel McAdams was beautiful, as always, and Channing Tatum was wonderful eye-candy. His acting is getting better too. I wish he'd play a different role though... time to get out of this awkward funny boy thing he has going on.
His eyes are kind of close together too. But he's hot so I can't judge.
So much to do today before I get to see my lover. Gah, what a slow, slow day.
Just finished 2/3 of one assignment, have to do an interview @ 4, then hopefully I can get the hell out of here by 5 or 6. I hate staying at school all day, it's so draining.
Sitting here feelin' kinda crazy, but not just any crazy; It's the kind you feel when you love somebody.
It's 4 a.m. and my lover won't answer, he's probably somewhere with a dancer sipping champagne while I'm in his bed.
My subconscious nearly gave me a fucking panic attack last night. It was great.
I woke up after having a dream that completely rattled me. It was awful, I don't even want to explain it because it was just that horrible of a thought and I hate my mind for showing that to me and now I can't get the image out of my head...
Happy Valentine's Day!
I know I'm a little late to say it, but I hope this joyous commercial occasion brought you some love, today.
It did for me, like it does every day.
I was under the impression I would have no V-day with my sweetheart. I was just a little upset...
But because he is no fool to my sometimes ridiculous girly nature, he surprised me with a grande box of chocolates (the true way to my heart; my stomach), a single rose (the best thing to get... ever), and a cute card. Does it get more V-day cliche romantic? Nope. But it was perfect.
Thanks boyfriend, you're the best! ;)
Happy V-day y'all, don't drown yourself in chocolate unless your lover asks you to.
I'd give anything to run my nails down a chalkboard right now. Love that sound. It freaks most people out, the eerie high pitch screech that makes your body shiver and shake. It's overwhelming, I think, to all of the senses. I like it... a lot.
I clench my teeth, close my eyes and enjoy.
A: I saw you before you became the Slayer. B: What? A: I watched you, and I saw you called. It was a bright afternoon in front of your school. You walked down the steps and I loved you. B: Why? A: 'Cause I could see your heart. You held it before you for everyone to see and I worried that it would be bruised or torn. More than anything in my life I wanted to keep it safe, to warm it with my own.
We touch, I feel a rush, we clutch, it isn't much but it's enough to make me wonder what's in store us, its lust. Its torterous. You must be a sorcerous cause you just did the impossible, gained my trust.
It's like an explosion everytime I hold you, I wasn't joking when I told you you take my breath away, you're a supernova and I'm a spacebound rocketship and your heart's the moon and I'm aiming right at you. 250 miles on a clear night in June and I'm aiming right at you.
Tonight I'll have the ladies over for my I hate Valentine's Day soiree. Apparently my title, which I chose because most of my girlfriends are single, and it's a stupid commercial occassion, has made some think I'm depressed. GREAT.
Not true though, I'm far from depressed, far from unhappy as well. Just think it's a silly day that puts pressure on men to do something nice for their lady, or vice versa... Which isn't a bad thing either.
Anyway, I can't talk about V-day anymore, I'm more excited to stuff my face with cupcakes and perogies.
Tonight, I will travel for a total of 3-4 hours to Niaraga Falls to have dinner with my dear friend, Brooke and her parents in celebration of her 20th birthday, yesterday.
I should have picked a better picture but this one will do. Love ya, girl.
I may or may not get steak out of this... Booyeah! Good thing too, I'm starving at the moment!
Brooke and I have had our ups and downs, highs and lows (usually highs), but we've managed to make it through. I value her opinion more so than a lot of people in my life (no offense to anyone else, lol). Considering I haven't seen her since 2011, I can't wait to see her pretty face sitting opposite of me at the dinner table.
We have lots to catch up on, as usual.
Soon, I'll be going to Ottawa to see her apartment, meet some of her friends and get super drunk for two consecutive days. Hooray for bitchy remarks and martinis.
I could see the sun rising in the East, pushing the dark sky backwards. In the West, the sky was a calm dark blue. The moon hung in slumber, perfectly parallel to it's enemy, the daylight.
I looked from the orange glow rising up out of abyss, to the pale stare of the man in the moon.
It was very calming, slowed my world down a little bit.
Phew, nothing better than a 10 hour sleep.
Boyfriend woke me up before my alarm went off, which wasn't all that bad considering I was having a rather disturbing dream that has since removed itself from my memory.
I came to school, didn't go to class. Sometimes I wonder why I do this.. travel all this way to not attend my class. Oops, silly girl. In all fairness, I was pretty late already and in most cases I'd rather not attend class than show up late. I hate being late for anything. It's just rude and disrespectful of the other persons time.
I didn't really want to go to begin with though, and at least now I have a few minutes to collect my thoughts in front of a computer screen. How therapeutic, right?
There is lots to be done in the next two weeks. It's only Tuesday now, but soon enough it will be Sunday night again and I will be freaking out over the things I need to have complete by Friday morning.
I'm going to start early. I will have everything done by next Wednesday. If I keep telling myself that, maybe it'll happen.
Come on Lala, get your shit together! :)
Not marble, nor the gilded monuments of princes, shall outlive this powerful rime; but you shall shine more bright in these contents than unswept stone, besmear'd with sluttish time.
When wasteful war shall statues overturn, and broils root out the work of masonry, nor Mars his swords nor war's quick fire shall burn the living record of your memory.
'Gainst death and all-oblivious enmity shall you pace fourth; your praise shall still find room even in the eyes of all posterity that wear this world out to the ending doom. So, till the judgement that yourself arise, you live in this, and dwell in lovers' eyes. -William Shakespeare
On the first page of our story the future seemed so bright, then this thing turned out so evil, I don't know why I'm still surprised.
Even angels have their wicked schemes, but you take that to new extremes. But you'll always be my hero, even though you lost your mind.
Just gunna stand there and watch me burn, but that's alright because I like the way it hruts. Just gunna tand there and hear me cry but that's alright because I love the way you lie.
I love the way you lie.
Now there's gravel in our voices, glasses shattered from the fight. In this tug-of-war you'll always win, even when I'm right 'cause you feed me fabels from your head with violent words and empty threats. And it's sick that all these battles are what keeps me satisfied.
Just gunna stand there and watch me burn, but that's alright because I like the way it hurts. Just gunna stand there and hear me cry but that's alright because I love the way you lie. Love the way you lie.
So maybe I'm a masochist, I try to run but I don't ever wanna leave til the walls are goin' up in smoke with all our memories.
Its morning, you wake, a sunray hits your face, smeared make-up as we lay in the wake of destruction. Hush baby, speak softly. Tell me you're awfully sorry that you pushed me into the coffee table last night so I can push you off me.
Try and touch me so I can scream at you not to touch me, run out the room and I'll follow you like a lost puppy. Baby, without you I'm nothing, I'm so lost, hug me. Then tell me how ugly I am but that you'll always love me. Then after that, shove me, in the aftermath of the destructive path that we're on, two psychopaths but we know that no matter how many knives we put in each other's backs that we'll have each other's backs, 'cause we're that lucky.
Together, we move mountains, yeah, let's not make mountains out of molehills, you hit me twice, yeah, but who's counting? I may have hit you three times, I'm starting to lose count, but together we'll live forever, we found the youth fountain.
Our love is crazy, we're nuts, but I refuse counsellin' this house is too huge, if you move out I'll burn all two thousand square feet of it to the ground, aint shit you can do about it.
With you I'm in my fucking mind, without you, I'm out it.
Just gunna stand there and watch me burn, but that's alright because I like the way it hurts. Just gunna stand there and hear me cry, but that's alright because I love the way you lie.
I hate waking up early and not realizing it. I was up at nine and didn't even realize it. I sent a couple text messages, ironically, but didn't think it was that early. So I showered and got myself ready, all before ten o'clock in the morning.
I went for a run, trying to kill some time, and realized that I'm incredibly out of shape. Sort of. Ugh, shoot me please.
Everyone I know is still sleeping or doing something interesting with their day. Nope. Not me, I'm sitting in front of a computer screen waiting for my phone to ring, something good to come on tv.
AND I CAN'T WATCH ANYMORE TV! I watched six episodes of Buffy yesterday, and two episodes of That 70's Show this morning.
Uuuuggghhh I'm just sooo booooooored. Fuuuuuuuuuck.
... On another note, I went out with the girls last night, which was a nice change consudering we haven't really done anything or gone anywhere since the holidays. We went to a bar, restaurant, combination... it was really nice, but we couldn't find anywhere to sit, so we left. On our way elsewhere, we were invited to a party, so we went. Then we left. Three of us went to get food, because clearly, we are women who follow their stomachs.
Uneventful, but a good night overall. It was nice to be with most of the girls.
Next week I will host our 'I hate Valentine's Day' soiree. Dranks! Woot.
All ma single ladies <3
What is your substance, whereof are you made, that millions of strange shadows on you tend?
Since every one hath, every one, one shade, and you, but one, can every shadow lend.
Describe Adonis, and the counterfeit is poorly imitated after you;
On Helen's cheek all art of beauty set, and you in Grecian tires are painted new:
Speak of the spring and foison of the year, the one doth shadow of your beauty show, the other as your bounty doth appear; and you in every blessed shape we know.
In all external grace you have some part, but you like none, none you, for constant heart. -William Shakespeare
As I walked uphill along the road, earbuds tightly packed into my ears(probably why I'm so deaf), I was almost dizzied as my upper peripherals caught a glimpse of the changing sky above me. The light grey sky ahead of me was beginning to contrast against a dark black background. The cloud was moving ahead of me, faster than I was walking, although I tried to keep up with it for a while. My short little legs couldn't do it. Sigh.
In a matter of minutes, there was a shift in temperature. It got colder, the wind picked up ever so slightly. The grey blanket that covered my sky, containing the moisture and heat close to the earth, had moved away from me and left me chilled.
I was slightly upset with the change in temperature, I didn't feel like walking for as long as I did. But then I noticed that the cloud moved away and left me with a black canvas sky that was studded with stars. Absolutely beautiful.
It's nice to take a step back and look at something beautiful. I try to see the beauty in simple things.
I also really like clouds... they're cool to look at when the sun is going down.
Blah blah blah, bed.
But wherefore do not you a mightier way make war upon this bloody tyrant, Time?
And fortify yourself in your decay with means more blessed than my barren rime?
Now stand you on the top of happy hours, and many maiden gardens, yet unset, with virtuous wish would bear you living flowers much liker than your painted counterfieit:
So should the lines of life repair, which this, Time's pencil, or my pupil pen, neither inward nor outward fair, can make you live yourself in eyes of men.
To give away yourself keeps yourself still; and yet you must live, drawn by your own sweet skill. -William Shakespeare
Look in thy glass, and tell the face thou viewest
Now is the time that face should form another;
Whose fresh repair if now thou not renewest, thou dost beguile the world, unbless some mother, for where is she so fair whose unrear'd womb disdains the tillage of thy husbandry?
Or who is he so fond will be the tomb of his self-love, to stop posterity?
Thou art thy mother's glass, and she in thee calls back the lovely April of her prime; so thou through windows of thine age shalt see, despite wrinkles, this thy golden time.
But if thou live, remember'd not to be, die single, and thine images die with thee. -William Shakespeare
I'm so glad it's the weekend. I can finally friggen relax.
I can't believe its February already. Where has the time gone?
I'm sure the next two weeks will fly by just as quickly as the last, and the two before that. I have a shit-ton of work to do before and after reading week, while trying to squeeze a 2-3 day trip to Ottawa sometime between the 20-24th.
I'll be at boyfriend's Sunday night, can't wait. Sleepovers are the best, but just being with him is better.
So cute, yuck. Can't help it.
Phew, just finished that assignment I've been (not)working on for the past couple days. Woke up at 5 after going to bed at 1, I feel like I'm going to fall over and die, but I don't think I will.
I'm just glad to have this finished; it's one lesser stress to think about. Now its the weekend and I don't have to do fuck all for the next two days. Thank goodness.
I'm craving my lover, I hate sleeping alone sometimes. I'm getting used to the loud sounds of the downtown world - the heavy trucks that drive over streetcar tracks all night and into the early morning don't exist in Mississauga.
Okay, I'm honestly too tired to write anything. Too bored. Blah.
I have a huge report due tomorrow morning that I desperately need to finished tonight don't have to wake up at 4 a.m. to do. My time is pressed already, I have to sit on the bus for an hour and a half before getting home to be bombarded, or something. Then I go to the doctor, oh, I really hope they take blood work todayYuck, not really though.
After the doctor, I go to work. So when will I have time to do this assignment 20% of my grade? Oh, at night, when I'm tired and annoyed from dealing with cheap people all evening.
I'm a little distraught right now. Although most of who read this don't give a flying eff about Gossip Girl, but this needs to be said;
I am pissed.
Chuck and Blair are my favourite television couple. Ever. Ever ever ever.
And now these writers are writing their romance right out of the show. Nooooooo!! I don't care if these writers are being slapped around for better material to pull viewers in... THE ENTIRE SHOW HAS BEEN ABOUT THEM. ALL FIVE SEASONS. THIS IS BULLSHIT.
"If two people are meant to be together, eventually they'll find their way back" -Chuck Bass